Alright, we touched on this a little bit in one of the blogs from conference last week, but now – as promised, we’ll paint a more comprehensive picture.
Several weeks ago (possibly months, but time is just a big blur right now, so who knows), our team at work went out for some drinks to send Bower off to his new job properly. We went to Famous Sam’s, got some food, had some drinks – a 90% good time. Anyone actually ON the team, knows where that other 10% falls, and its name – but we’ll not digress into that story today.
Now, we were having some shots of Patron, margaritas, beer, all the normal. Somewhere along the lines, we found out that Lesli hasn’t ever done tequilla shots before. WELL – then of course she’ll be doing them with us!! Through the course of the next couple of hours, Lesli had done 3 shots of Patron, with 2 margaritas. I had downed 4 shots of Patron and 3 margaritas. However, it hadn’t escaped attention that neither of us had anything more than just a slight buzz. Hmmmm…well, now that’s odd.
It felt like tequilla. It tasted like tequilla. It didn’t seem to be watered down. Who waters down a shot, anyway??
As we were discussing it Monday at work, we decided that the only responsible thing to do was to perform our own, very scientific tests. This meant of course, that one-or both-of us were going to need to have shots and margaritas that we made and poured ourselves to compare the results. That way we would KNOW the tequilla was good. We would either prove 1) there was something VERY broken with the tequilla at Famous Sam’s, or 2) we’re complete alcholics who can remain totally unaffected by 3 bottles of tequilla, and would then need to check into a rehab facility.
And now, flash forward to User’s Conference last week. After our plane arrived, and we FINALLY found the correct shuttle (cough cough hack), got to the hotel to check in and have roughly 7 minutes to drop our bags – it was off for our support staff dinner out.
What I hadn’t already shared, is that as we pulled up in the vomit-mobile, sitting in the entrance-pully-in-place, were two beauuuuuuteeefullll stretch Hummer limos. It was like licking maggots out of a used bed-pan, while the person across from you eats a double helping of creme brulee from a bowl made of diamonds. Salt + wound = ouch.
After we had all assembled out front of the hotel, the Hummers pull up to take us to the restraunt. YAY!!!! THIS is more like it. THIS is why we love Robb.
We cram into our limos, and off we go to Landry’s for an evening of seafood and drinks. Which brings us back to the point of this little posting.
For our fun little froo-froo drinks, Lesli and I both started with strawberry margaritas. Which were sublime by the way. Little strawberry seeds and everything. Quite yummy. However, Loftus ordered a Long Island Iced Tea. That sounded VERY appealing. Unfortunately, since the very first time my beloved sister-in-law Billie introduced me to them, they have tended to put me right under the table…faster than any other drink I’ve found. So I decided to wait a little bit (knowing my limits, STELLA) and make that my second drink.
Through the course of dinner, we drank, ate, enjoyed each other’s company, took care of some last minute house keeping issues and questions, blah, blah, blah. We also came to the conclusion, that if this was all being treated by the company, why would we not order top shelf?! So the NEXT round was just that – all top shelf drinks. And so it was with my Long Island.
O
M
G
That was by FAR the strongest drink I have ever had in my life! The only thing it could possibly have come second behind, would be the time I didn’t realize you don’t so much just pour Jack Daniels into a normal dinner size glass…and drink. And it wasn’t just the Long Islands (though I swear Adrian’s came completely clear!!), all of the drinks were cranked WAY UP! They weren’t messing around!! So Lesli’s second margarita was nice and toasty as well.
This was all we had to drink that night. That happened over the course of maybe 3 hours? With a full dinner…including dessert (that we were too stuffed to eat). And with just those 2 drinks, absolutely zero shots, this is where a HUGELY tipsy Lesli, starts telling everyone abaout the difference between this, and the time we had all of the shots at Sam Levitz for Bower’s club.
For anyone who might not know, Sam Levitz is a popular furniture warehouse here, and if you remember correctly – it was Bower’s going away party….not some secret club we’d inducted ourselves into. Bless her heart! So now the others at our table have begun looking at her with very confused and wary expressions – as if she’d just plunked a man’s sweaty “support strap” in the middle of the table.
At this point she turns to me for help, and explains what she’s trying to tell them. It’s not going to be a surprise to ANY of you that I laughed very hard at her. And the rest of the table was relived to hear the real story, and that we hadn’t really turned to a discussion of armoires.
So clearly….this gives us some good data for our little experiment. But it didn’t end there. As previously mentioned, while taking a quick tour of the hotel and the rooms we’d need to be working in, I was blessed enough to turn just in time to see her walk SMACK into a wall. It was that very moment in time, that I started the blog that ya’ll got from my phone. Because THAT just couldn’t wait any longer!! Data now holding much more weight!
Once the tour was over, Lesli, Sheila, Mathias and myself stood around in the lobby chit-chatting. Lesli kept staring at the ceiling – which was made completely of glass. Finally she tells us:
L: I think it’s just sooo cool how those elevators go at an angle like that.
D: That’s not an elevator, it’s an inclinator.
L: What’s an inclinator?
D: It’s an elevator that goes at an angle.
And as we continued to talk, I would notice that every couple of minutes, Lesli would lose focus, and her head would roll back (much like a baby who can’t hold their heads up) so she could stare at the pretty lights going up the glass.
L: I just like to watch the elevators.
D: Inclinators.
S: Those are regular elevators – we’ve all ridden in them to get to our rooms.
At this point the conversation turned to who stayed on which side of the hotel, and used which elevators/inclinators, etc.
S: Look! All you’re seeing is the reflection of the real elevators in the glass of the ceiling.
I looked again, and sure enough! Everytime one of the elevators would go up or down…there went our mystical inclinators. Now we’re all shaking our heads at Lesli who had spent the better part of 15 minutes staring at them in wonder. It was truly a moment to treasure.
So in conclusion, I’d like to state – the tequilla at Famous Sam’s is, indeed, VERY broken. And WE have the data to prove it!
