You know how sometimes on cars you will see the little yellow spoof caution sign stickers? You know what I mean…it’s the yellow, 4-sided diamond shape – and going across the middle it says “CAUTION” in big black letters – and then above and below it will say what they brake for.
Some will say “Caution: I brake for shopping”, or “Caution: I brake for chocolate”.
I would think my top picks would be “Caution: I brake for Cullens”, or “I brake for Target”, “I brake for Valentino Rossi”….maybe even “I brake for whacking evil people I don’t much like over the head with large, hard objects”. (Admittedly, that last one might just be remnants from a very horrible and hard day at work. But then again, maybe not.)
Anyway….I’m driving home today and the car in front of me had one of these signs in his rear window. It read:
“CAUTION : I brake for cemeteries”
I’m sorry, what?? You brake where again?
What the hell kind of sign is THAT to display?!? You brake for cemeteries?? I…you…there…I can’t…(blink, blink) (blink, blink)…huh?
I just….have no words.
You could tell me to smack someone’s grandma on the ass, while exclaiming “Go milk me a cow Bertha!”…. and my expression would be no less confused, my speech no more lost, than trying to figure out THAT little nugget of shared information.
I followed a lot less closely for the rest of the ride home. Not because there are a plethora of cemeteries between the freeway and my house that I was afraid he might stop short for, but because I was suddenly afraid of how many spells he might be able to cast simply using a rear view mirror.
Creepy much?!
